After quite a bit of trial and error on the commandline, I think I've found the answer. But it isn't a cp-related answer.
rsync -ptgo -A -X -d --no-recursive --exclude=* first-dir/ second-dir
This does:
-p, --perms preserve permissions
-t, --times preserve modification times
-o, --owner preserve owner (super-user only)
-g, --group preserve group
-d, --dirs transfer directories without recursing
-A, --acls preserve ACLs (implies --perms)
-X, --xattrs preserve extended attributes
--no-recursive disables recursion
For reference
--no-OPTION turn off an implied OPTION (e.g. --no-D)
-r, --recursive recurse into directories
-r, so it is ignoring directories. But I guess you want to copy only the attributes, not the contents? I can think of only ugly hacks. Also note thatinstallcan preserve SELinux contexts. – lynxlynxlynx Jul 29 '12 at 20:03